I love Pinterest. Unabashedly. Probably too much. But I also have a problem with how it is used. (There is a difference). I have started looking through the pins and seeing them for what they really are. So many (this is often on the ‘Everything’ section, so it isn’t just who I follow) of these pins are “get rid of ___ in 5 minutes a day!” or “3000 tricks for smooth flat abs” There is not time in the day to do all the exercises “every woman should do”. (More on this at a later date)
Today I saw a pin that was for postnatal exercises. Great idea, help the body recover from 9 months of abnormality. What really bothered me was the next statement, “Start this the day you bring baby home”. While I currently do not have any children, I know a lot about the process of birth (academically, of course). From what I understand, the day after you have a baby, you hurt, and you are tired. Babies are demanding on their own. A woman doesn’t need the world telling her that she needs to start attacking her body 48 hours after expelling a human from it. It took 9 months to get in that shape, and it’s going to take some time to get it back. But starting day one just seems overly aggressive to me.
I think that moms need to spend some time getting used to being a mother, no matter how many other children they have. They need to adjust to being that child’s mother. And that child doesn’t really care if her mother is still wearing maternity pants a week later. And that’s what really matters.
C. Jane Kendrick writes some of the most beautiful, heartfelt things, and she has done it again. I highly recommend reading her latest post, found Here. I’m still formulating my thoughts about it, so look forward to another post in the next couple of days as a response. Now go. Read it. I promise you won’t regret it.
A lighthearted but sincere discussion about being a Mormon Feminist.
Ask Mormon Girl
Over the last couple of years I feel I have been transforming. I am no longer the completely accepting Mormon woman, who accepts all the teachings of the church as truth, and just say, “I’ll understand it in the eternities. Don’t worry about that now.” I think I started to see something going on within myself when I lived in California during the Prop 8 stuff and was not in alignment with what seemed to be every other Mormon’s opinion. I started reading Feminist Mormon Housewives at first because it appalled me a little. But then I actually started to agree with some of the things that I was reading. Then I started reading Ask Mormon Girl and recently added Young Mormon Feminists. I had a realization that I actually AM a feminist.
My problem is . . . How do I come out of the closet?
My husband is…
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As a student at Brigham Young University, I am surrounded by a fairly conservative bunch. In a Family Theory class a few months back, we were asked to invite professional women who self identified as feminists for a panel discussion. (Discussion of the panel can be found here and here) During this panel, Courtney Kendrick asked if feminist was a bad word on campus. A few nervous laughs, but otherwise awkward silence as the class all realized that it probably was a ‘bad word’ in their minds and in the minds of their peers.
After this panel, I was thinking and talking to my husband and we realized that the term feminist scares people because of the historical connotations and images people have in their minds. In nearly every conversation about feminism, I feel that a definition needs to be given. Everyone has their own ‘brand’ of feminism. When pressed on the issue, most people identify with ideas that are feminist at heart. Equal pay. Access to education. Etc. These are strictly feminist. What people are imagining are these man-hating, bra-burning, demanding women. This isn’t the picture for every feminist, or even the majority.
What is my brand of feminism? I’m not sure yet. I suppose that a lot of it isn’t vying for major reforms in society. Maybe I am a feminist on the issues that don’t have a solid backing. When someone asks, “Why can’t/isn’t a woman do this instead/as well?” and the answer is “They just never have”, I have more of a problem. Excluding/diminishing women because it is the tradition doesn’t sit right with me. If there is a reason, that is fine and I accept that. I just like to know the answers. I need to hammer out what exactly I think, but I think that will come with time.
Are you a feminist? What does your ‘brand’ look like?